astrolily:

I’m not sure if I quite believe all of this is going on, but I have to say that some things are believable in this, but some just seem so outlandish that its hard to say. These conspiracies could actually be true though and that’s actually just insanity!

• There are many Illuminated groups, with…

* Be happy

* Hike at least once a week

* Run mornings and nights

* Get closer to old friends

* Make new friends

* Hawaii

* Get license

* Road trip to San Diego, San Fran and Mexico (if I get my passport)

* Visit my dad

* Get a job

* Start college classes

* Start up a new book

* Go to Kahneeta

* Long bike rides

* Camp at least every other week

* Hike East side of Mt. Hood again

* Eat healthier

* Make home made ice-cream

* If I move grow my own garden

* Save up for a car

* Go fishing

***More will be added****

I haven’t written on Tumblr in a long time, but right now I actually feel like it (feel like ranting anyways). Without proper grammar and what not because well… first, it’s Tumblr and I’m typing on my Itouch.

Lately I was feeling like I was in a rush to get my GED done ASAP, it’s my own fault though and I am aware of that but I feel like no one is supporting me to get it done. So my out come to that was rushing it so my family will actually notice that I worked hard on it. My last test is on Thursday… I am really nervous, I feel sick every time I start to think about it. That happened to me every time I took every single test. Anyways, I am trying to get it done and impress myself and not my family anymore. I don’t care about people’s opinions on the GED anymore also, because if they think it’s what ‘drop outs’ do they don’t have the right education.

I also feel like I am losing/lost my boyfriend and best friend, (I’m not going to write the problems) I’ve learned so much from him and he has from me as well. I am grateful for everything he has showed me and done for me. It may sound stupid to others but I feel like I was on the right path with him and that I was finding myself with him and everything. Now everything has changed, not with me but with him. But all of that is his part and he just can’t figure it out, even when I tell him…He’s taking other people’s advice and it’s not doing any good on both of us. I just want to a positive day with him… With good vibes and not discuss on what we need to work on and our flaws in our relationship just for a day and see if he remembers how good we are together. I hope we work out to the fullest. If not, I guess I would be happy just staying friends because he is the most beautiful person I have ever met.

I really hope I can go somewhere far this summer because I really can’t stand my mom’s boyfriend anymore. I just need a break from all this drama and not stay home all the time studying and not doing anything productive. Plus, I love to travel and see new things and meet new people and learn new cultures. I have enough money for a two way ticket and to get some nice stuff and food. I really hope something fucking awesome works out for me.

If anyone actually read this… POINTS FOR YOU to listen/read to/all this drama. I know I’m complaining about what every teenage girl has to complain about, but to inform you I would rather help others then to worry about myself… but honestly it feels good to write rants once in a long while. More people should do it and more people should do it less.

I’m scared that I am going to lose my best friend.